Best Laid Schemes

The best laid schemes o’ Mice an’ Men
Gang aft agley

~Robert Burns, “To a Mouse”

[image description: domestic cat with its prey (a mouse). Stiopa, CC BY-SA 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0, via Wikimedia Commons]

Once there was a mouse
Who had the rule of the house
‘Til the house’s owner got a cat,
And that was the end of that.

And so the mouse hid in his hole
And didn’t see another soul
For almost twenty days
As he studied feline ways.

He laboured in fits and starts,
Drawing up maps and charts,
Ate only the plaster off the wall,
And hardly slept at all.

He stayed alert by popping pills,
Ran simulations, conducted drills,
Made deductions and calculations,
Thought up different situations,

Considered cause and correlation,
Allowed for every complication,
Chance occurrences and error–
But not his own unreasoning terror.

So it was that, when one night,
Thinking that the time was right,
He boldly ventured forth in search
Of food, the cat from her high perch

Did swiftly pounce, and frozen there,
Our friend the mouse could only stare
As down she fell, eager to sup–
And with fierce claws she snatched him up.

The lesson learned was dearly bought,
His best laid schemes were all for naught;
For life is governed by vicious laws
Splintering bones with crushing jaws.

© 2010 by Strider Lee

Published by striderlee

Dungeon Master, homebrewer, foodie, bibliophile, and fantasy author. He/Him

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